Dating can be a scary venture at any age. With hookups and friends with benefits, all of which are fine, but sometimes it can be difficult to determine where you stand with a guy.
From some of us we rely apps and other gizmos to find someone. The dating world has evolved in this tech-savvy era.But there is something original about finding someone in person.
Sure it may seemed old fashioned in today’s modern world, but there is something magical in the unexpected. Bumping into a cute stranger on the street or getting a smile from a hottie from the coffee shop.
Even a little extra attention from a male friend is enough to make you giddy. Dating a friend can be fun, unexpected, and comes with its own set of benefits:
1. You both have the same group of friends.
Chances are that you share some of the same group of friends as one another. This means that you have a common interests and like to hang out with people that share those interests.
So he won’t think it’s too weird if you and your friends dress up as zombies and go to the local zombie prom. Everyone has quirks! If he is involved with the same group of friends as you then he is likely to have those same quirks.
2. His friends/ family know who you are. Or at least know about you.
If he likes you then his friends and family are likely to like you too. Or at least know who are even if they don’t like you.
What I am mean by this is that you are not a phantom to them. They can put a face to a name. He is not trying to keep you a “dirty little secret”. He values you enough to make your presence known to his inner circle.
Even if his friends/family have not met you yet they will in the near future.
3. Your friends/family know who he is. Or at least know about him.
Similarly, your not keeping your potential love interest quiet. All you do is talk about him.
You get all giddy when you talk about him. He way he smiles at you when he catches you doing something cute. Or how he holds your hand in public proving that he isn’t afraid of Public Displays of Affection (PDA).
You gush when you tell your friends about your dates in lengthy detail. And you may even brag on him to a stranger or two. So build him up into this Thorian hero (think of Chris Hemsworth as Thor in the Avengers movies).
You inner circle is just as excited as you are. They can’t wait to meet him and schedule double dates and such.
4. You know him well enough to be comfortable around him.
You wouldn’t necessarily brush him off like you would some creep at the bar. Trust me, sister, we have all been there. Flagging down our friends to get the creep away from us.
No, he has to some degree gained your trust. So you let your guard down around him a little. You let him see the real you: the good, the bad, and the ugly.
And for all its worth you actually enjoy being around him.
5. You have similar personalities enough, so you can get along.
It is true that opposites attract. Still most of us look for similarities within potential friends and love interests. We enjoy having a balance.
If someone doesn’t share any similarities to us then we lose interest. At the same time, if a person is too similar to then we also lose interest. Because we feel that there is nothing exciting, or new about this person to keep us around.
I know this all seems a little confusing, but let me nreak it down for you. We appreciate contradictions that break the mold of streotypes and societal expectations. A businessman with tattoos, a biker that is classically trained, or an outgoing nun. We love exploring those contradictions in one another.
Everybody wants someone with depth. Call it personality, call it character. Maybe they have the “it factor” that sets them apart from everyone else. But everybody someone who has something more than what meets the eye.
6. He enjoys spending time with you.
He likes you. So he doesn’t mind spending time with you. Yes, he may know you as part of the group. But he wants to spend some time with you alone.
He will let you know he is interested in some one on one. And I’m not talking about hooking up. Trust me, honey, you will know the difference.
If he is unsure about how to approach you he will do it subtlety as to avoid out right rejection. He may start being slightly more attentive to you. Things like engaging you more in conversation, gazing at you when you are not looking etc.
You will get a gut feeling that his affections toward you have changed. When it comes to your gut i.e. your female intuition listen to it, because there are a few more accurate than the female intuition. (That’s a joke by the way, sometimes we are wrong ladies. But you get the general picture, right?)
7. Protects you.
Now this is not to say that he is the jealous controlling type. Rather if the situation calls for it he is ready to step in and defend you, I’ll clarify in a moment.
Let’s say that you and your man are out and about at the bar. Your man decides to get you drinks leaving you at the booth alone. A creeper comes out of nowhere approaches you.
You are clearly uncomfortable and you tried to deter this creeper, but it hasn’t worked. Now you you think your man is going to sit idly by as a creeper tries to hit on you? No.
(And if does kick him to the curb because you deserve better.) He says something to the creeper and creeper backs down and tries to get out of dodge.
8. If he values your friendship than your opinion is important to him.
A guy’s natural inclination is fix things. Guys are fixers. They opt to deal with the physical rather than the emotional, but if they like you they will try to deal with the emotional.
What I mean is they will listen to you and try to communicate with you. Furthermore, they will try to understand and value your opinion.
Alright, so I like a guy that can grow a good amount of facial hair. I don’t care for a messy looking beard, however. So I tell him I like his beard but I prefer it to be neat. What does he do? He combs it.
It is little things that show me that he values my opinion. Be careful not to abuse this power, because once you have it can go straight to your head.
9. He will put in some effort to get ready for your date.
Guys get nervous too. He will want to look good for your date. He may think about a nice place for dinner.
Whether it a coffee date, or an fancy dinner date. He will put some effort into a date that both of you can enjoy.
These are a few benefits of being friends with the guy you date.